Written by Ella Hodson
“How are you doing it?!” my friends ask when I tell them I haven’t been on social media for four days.
Truthfully, at that point, I was fine. I had kept myself busy with other things, and having them over helped me out too. I was busy with uni work, writing stories, so I had a lot I needed to be doing, and scrolling through social media was distracting me way too much.
I deleted Snapchat, Instagram and Twitter off my phone a few weeks ago because, as I found myself scrolling, my chest began to tighten and my throat started to close up, I was also angry at people, for no reason.
And why should instagram of all things be giving me these feelings you ask?
I have absolutely no idea.
My favourite form of social media, Instagram, had begun to let me down, where people hide behind a facade.
It’s become a much more talked about topic nowadays, that people are sometimes not who they say they are on the internet. Whether that be a “catfish” or just being old-fashioned two faced. They hide behind the filters and stories, and make everyone – like me – think they’re living the perfect life.
I’m talking about the infamous ‘fashion blogger’ of course, and it cannot be applied to everyone.
Not only that, I was spending too much time worrying what people thought of me. Of course, like anyone, I have a desire to be liked; that doesn’t change for my online persona.
I like to think that my online persona is sort of funny, laid back, but not afraid to share my opinion when it matters. But I am also guilty of not showing the whole story. I won’t post when i’m having a down day, and I’ll only share the cool things that have happened to me. Such as, going to a gig, buying a new item of clothing, or being on holiday.
I won’t post when I’ve had no sleep and had to spend the day in bed.
Social media and deteriorating mental health is something that needs to be addressed in some sort of way desperately. Kanye West suggested not showing the likes on a photo/video and hiding how many followers someone has. As ridiculous as some people might think he is, he has a point. How much is easier would it be if you didn’t see how many people ‘liked’ your photo? Or how many followers you have? On the one hand, I don’t want to care about how many likes I have, and I want to be laid back about it – like I am about most things in ‘real life’. But at the same time, I still can’t help checking the likes going up on a photo I’ve posted – wondering whether it will hit 100 soon.
I don’t feel like I need social media to fulfill my life now after even this short break, and I am trying to see it as a little bit of fun than I did pre-break.
I downloaded Instagram back, and the first thing I did was go through the people I followed and unfollowed masses of people until I was happy that I wasn’t going to be feeling overwhelmed anymore. I still haven’t downloaded Snapchat and Twitter back onto my phone, and I’m enjoying life as a one social-media platform gal.